What do you do when you wake up one morning and realize the life you are living isn’t the life you want? Not off by a few details, but off by every detail. It isn’t just that I want to move to a different state instead of being rooted to the one where it all began. It’s that I’m doing the wrong job, I’m not spending time doing things I enjoy, I can’t remember the last time I’ve laughed until my sides hurt. My life has become an obligation over an adventure.
Maybe it’s my generation. “You millennials,” people say frowning, “don’t understand the way the world works.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told that I have a job that pays me enough, I have a roof over my head, I should be happy. Or how many times I’ve heard that I should be satisfied with what I have, that this is just the way life is.
This is the way life is? Wake up, go to work, suffer through the day, come home, and relax for a while, and do it again all the next day. Ideally, you’d get some healthy eating and exercise in your day, or some other type of productive activities that make you better as a person. Then, weekends are filled with things you’re obligated to do. When you do have some extra time on your hands, you don’t know what you even want to do, so you waste time watching TV and laying on the couch.
This is where the years of school got me, the crippling student loans? I spent my time wishing school would go faster just so I could get to this point? A life infused with mediocrity and routines? Some of my peers seem to have figured it out–traveling, working where they want, being happy. But can you trust anything you see on social media? We live in a world where we compare ourselves to others, but the version of they want us to see. We take social media pages as a description of lives, but (most) people only post the best parts of life, the sharable parts.
How can we infuse life with real happiness? Happiness in every part of life, not just in the sharable moments. I want more than this. I want to change my life. But, like so many others, I don’t know where to begin. So, for now, I’ll continue the routine and hope that one day, instead of waking up realizing I’m not where I want to be, I’ll wake up thinking: “This. This is what living should be.”